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Bosox Envy
by Mike Carminati

In a move that flies in the face of all of John Nash's best pick-up lines, George Steinbrenner is complaining about his dance partners in this round of interleague play. He is upset that the Red Sox drew the beer-goggled pair of Milwaukee and Pittsburgh while the Yanks drew the ravishing Reds and Cubs.

"Katy Feeney makes the schedule, and she has never been a favorite of mine or a favorite of the Yankees," Steinbrenner said. "We play Cincinnati, which is a fine, fine ball club; they're going to be in the middle of it. Then we play the Cubs.

"Now who is the other guy playing? They're playing against Milwaukee. Now what's right about that? They're playing Pittsburgh and Milwaukee while we're playing Cincinnati and the Cubs. I think they got the best of that deal.

"Bud Selig told me personally that he was overseeing the schedule, and that he'll see to it that it's fine. I used to be for it, but I'm not for it anymore. It's too easy for discrepancies."

Well, if Bud Selig is in control, then it's OK. He would never do anything to give Boston an unfair advantage. Hey, the Yankees do get three free passes at the end of interleague play against the Mets, so maybe he shouldn't complain.

All kidding aside, this does show how ridiculous interleague play is in MLB. The teams play 162 games to determine a champion. Those 162 games should be against common opponents so that it is clear (or as clear as possible) who is the best team in the division at the end of the year. This isn't the NFL, where a balanced schedule is impossible.

That's just reason number 17 in the H.R. Block list of "Why we hate interleague play". Thank you.

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