The Phils are today flying their shaving cream pies at half mast. For Tomas, mighty Tomas Perez has been let go.

First, they dye the Phanatic red, ….

And now this. What's next, will they get rid of Schmitters in the left field concession area? Heaven forefend!

Perez became expendable when the Phils signed the cast of "Take Me Out to the Ballgame" —"O'Brien to Ryan to Goldberg"!—to buttress/replace lamb-duck third baseman David Bell. The team acquired Alex S. Gonzalez, who you'll remember from "Family Ties", who was shortstop in his former life with the Blue Jays and Cubs, and Abraham O. Nunez, who filled in for exiled ex-Phil Scott Rolen at third for the Cards last year. The Phils evidently want to change their tradition of signing lesser siblings (Ken Brett, Tim Worrell, etc.) to signing players who need to use a middle initial so as not to be confused with another player of the same name. At least they have a schtick.

It takes a village to replace the Tomas Perez, who was basically a backup or emergency backup at every defensive position (he even pitched once). Ostensibly Gonzalez (who made a nice stop yesterday in the spring finale) will cover short and third and Nunez will cover second and third.

As for who's backing up first, your guess is as good as mine. The only guy the Phils have on their bench who has ever even played first in the majors is backup catcher Sal Fasano, who has a grand total of six games there. I guess David Dellucci becomes the logical choice, but he has never played first—not that it's rocket science—and he is a lefty bat, the same as starter Ryan Howard. Or maybe Pat Burrell (58 career games at first) will shift to first and Dellucci, the superior fielder, would play left. I'm not sure how'll Burrell will react to that especially if Howard goes down for an extended period of time with an injury.

The outfield is better stocked than usual. They have Shane Victorino AND David Dellucci now backing up the starters as opposed to just Jason Michaels. As for emergency catcher, I hope Victorino has invested in a catcher's mitt. Two 34-year-old catchers? Eek.

Anyway, as Tomas passes the baton, er, cream pie to the next generation benchwarmers, I am reminded to the great utility men on the Phils clubs from my childhood (Greg Gross, Del Unser, Luis Aguayo, Tommy Hutton, Terry Harmon) and I am left trying to figure out how Tomas compares to them. Let's see.

First, I looked at just those players who were exclusively bench players for the Phils. That means that they never played more games at a given position than any other player and they never qualified for a batting title as a Phil. I wanted just career bench players (sorry Del Unser—he was the starting center fielder in his first tour of duty in Philly). Next, I limited the list to just primarily position players.

Here are the men who spent the most years in a Phils uniform as a benchwarmer:

Next are the men who played the most games exclusively as a bench player in Philly"

Perez makes both lists.

He also comes in fourth in career bench homers:

And second in RBI:

Perez was sixth in runs:

Tied for second in hits:

He's first in doubles:

Second in strikeouts:

Second in intentional passes:

Eighth in bunts:

Third in plate appearances:

100th in batting average (.249). Here are the leaders (min. 100 plate appearances):

134th in on-base (.303):

66th in slugging (.371):

And 95th in OPS (.674):

I put Perez number three among Phillie utility infielders, behind the great Little Louie Aguayo and the long-lasting Terry Harmon. Among outfield-first base types, I would rank Gross first followed by Lonnie Smith, Joe Lefebrve, Jason Michaels, Jerry Martin, and Downtown Ollie Brown. The recently departed Todd Pratt comes in at number one among catchers with Bobby Estelella.

Also, Tomas Perez gets added brownie points for having played six positions as a Phil. Here are all the Philly players to play at least six. Rojas played all nine in one game. (And you might notice the ubiquitous Kid Gleason, as always, makes the list):