Pregame

National Anthem—More country hee haw schmaltz. Some nondescript country singer. Now, let some fan site link to that.

Montage—ends with Babe Ruth winking. Didn't think he was playing tonight.

Chris Myers—references lunar eclipse, "the planets are aligned" for a Red Sox win. More schmaltz.

Red Sox 1st

Damon—2-seamer called strike. 2 high 4-seamers. Why fastballs? 2-seamer—gone to right. Red Sox 1, Cards 0

Cabrera—4-seamer nubber halfway to third, great play Rolen

Ramirez—low. Called strike. Inside. Low. High. Walk.

Ortiz—outside. McCarver—"LaRussa's one batter away from getting Haren up". Low. Strike on outside corner. 4-seamer, swings through. Outside—full count. Flies to straightaway left. Ah, Mabry is finally in a game—too late.

Varitek—called strike outside corner. Change at knees right over plate—0-2. Low—blocked Molina. Fastball called a ball, looked good—at knees. Foul tip on same pitch. Outside—curve? Ks

Go Johnny Go—"Johnny B Goode", Chuck Berry for Damon.

1 run, 1 hit, 1 LOB
Red Sox 1, Cards 0

Cards 1st

Womack—way outside. Looked outside—called strike. Lines off Cabrera's glove as he leaps. Jumped early. Single.

Walker—inside. Throws to first. Bunts to Lowe's right. Sacrifice good. I guess they are desperate for runs.

Pujols—high and inside—checks. Grounds to right of back. Bellhorn positioned there. Out.

Rolen—fouled off. Low. Hits dribbler down first base line. Lowe gets it, rolen dive headfirst, tags him.

0 runs, 1 hit, 1 LOB
Red Sox 1, Cards 0

Red Sox 2nd

Mueller—2-seamer at knees—called ball. Outside—curve? Strike called—outside corner. Grounds to Womack.

Nixon—In the dirt. Inside. Lines 4-seamer to right-center. Walker—sliding stop, nice, holds him to a double.

Bellhorn—Low. "Let's Go Red Sox"?—greatest fans in the world? Strike—outside corner. Low. Outside. Crushes one inside to deep right—foul. Outside. Walk.

So when do they get Marquis?

McCarver—predicts wheel play.

Lowe—outside. Bunt down, to mound, Rolen there but bobbles. Slides and barely gets Lowe. Well done by Cards.

Damon—Low. Outside. 2-seamer gets the outside corner. 4-seamer-fouls to left of third. Pujols unassisted.

0 runs, 1 hit, 2 LOB
Red Sox 1, Cards 0

Cards 2nd

Edmonds-strike inside corner. Flies to left.

Hank Aaron. Barry Bonds. Lot o' homers there.

Renteria—Called on the outside corner. Low. Low and outside. Fouls at plate. Mistake up—lines to Mueller on one hop, out.

Mabry—low and inside. Catches inside corner. Hanger—right to Nixon.

0 runs, 0 hits, 0 LOB
Red Sox 1, Cards 0

Red Sox 3rd

Cabrera—More fastballs? 2-seamer right over plate—called strike. Outside. Low and outside. 2-seamer, just misses, flies to shallow left.

Little league pitches of Jason Marquis. Varitek also in LL World Series.

Ramirez—2-seamer in—fouled. Inner half—lined to left.

Ortiz—low I guess—fastball. Again—lines into RF corner. 2nd and third. Good pitch selection!

Varitek—video from LL WS with Bad News Bears theme. High and In. Low. Curve—looked low—called strike. Varitek doesn't like it. Again—outside. 3-1. 4-seamer—grounds to first, Pujols at line, goes home, Ramirez way out.

Mueller—1st and 3rd. Outside. To mound. Outside. In the dirt—blocked Molina. High—walk. No one up still in the pen! Incredible!

Nixon—called low, looked borderline. Low again. Again. Goes on 3-0, high heat outside, deep to right-center, 2/3 up the wall. Double. 2 runs. 2nd and 3rd.

Bellhorn—IBB to get to pitcher.

Lowe—low and outside. Finally LaRussa on phone to pen. Misses high heat. Fastball right over the plate. 1-2. Called ball—looked good at knees on outside corner. Ks.

2 runs, 3 hits, 3 LOB
Red Sox 3, Cards 0

Cards 3rd

Molina—Ugly K on change? (doesn't like sinker)

Marquis—why is he batting? Grounds to short

Womack—called strike. Low twice. Grounds to short.

0 runs, 0 hits, 0 LOB
Red Sox 3, Cards 0

Red Sox 4th

Damon—"Red Sox fighting back smiles in their dugout". Fouled back. Called inside—looked borderline. Outside. Called inner corner. Grounds slowly to second, past Marquis, Womack shuffles with glove to first. Out. Nice play.

Cabrera—high heat up and in. "Let's Go Red Sox!" High heat—fouled. Curve low. Ball. Missed change? Flies high heat to center.

Ramirez—arguing with Molina? Ump? Someone? Francona out. Wonder what Manny said. Outside. Low. Outside. Flies to deep center-out.

0 runs, 0 hits, 0 LOB
Red Sox 3, Cards 0

Cards 4th

Walker—Outside. Inside but close—2-0. Fans are up for first time. Curve on outside corner. Hits to warning track in right. Nixon has it.

Pujols—Called strike—looked borderline low. Again—not this time. Fouled off. Ks on curve outside. Ugly.

Rolen—jams to 1st base side in front of dugout. Ortiz squeezes it.

0 runs, 0 hits, 0 LOB
Red Sox 3, Cards 0

Red Sox 5th

Bonnie Tyler—Total Eclipse of the Heart.

Ortiz—called strike outside corner. Outside. Same as #1—didn't get it. Fouls off low fastball. 2-2. Bouncer. 3-2. Low and inside. Take yer base.

Haren up in pen. Duncan to mound.

Varitrek—low and outside. Outside. Right over plate—takes. Fouled off. Low fastball—called third K.

Mueller—checks, but called on inside corner—I guess. Fouled off. 100th pitch. Molina sets up outside. Inside fastball—just missed, fouled back. Curve—in dirt inside again Moina outside. In dirt. Low. Ground low fastball to Womack, runner going, goes to first.

Nixon—flies out Edmonds going back.

0 runs, 0 hits, 0 LOB
Red Sox 3, Cards 0

Cards 5th

Edmonds—Called strike. Lines to Muller.

Renteria—2 low and outside. Change on inside corner, had him turning away. Outside—but foul tipped. Boul. Sinker, one hands into gap left-center. Damon falls down after catch. Double.

Mabry—fastball way outside. Varitek misses it completely. PB—Renteria to 3rd. change—fouls to right. Fouls to left. Foul tip? Varitek reacts that way. Then tags. Out. Way outside—hard to tell. Diamond Cam? Argues. Hard to tell. Shouldn't complain when he swings at that cheese.

Molina—Outside. Called strike. In dirt—blocked. PH? Grounds to short. Boos rain down.

0 runs, 1 hit, 1 LOB.
Red Sox 3, Cards 0

Red Sox 6th

Marquis is still in????

Bellhorn—called strike at knees. Little lower—ball. Called strike. In dirt. No one in pen. Ks on low curve?

Chris Myers—interviews a Boston kid playing hooky. Where's the truant officer?

Lowe—grounds hard to pitcher.

Damon—More F'ing fastballs! Lined to right-center. Triple. Reyes up in pen—Reyes again????

Cabrera—"Let's go red sox!" and "A-holes" Outside twice. Fouled. Called on outside corner—looked like off. Foul. King now up—for Ortiz? Sheez. Flies to right.

0 runs, 1 hit, 1 LOB
Red Sox 3, Cards 0

Cards 6th

Anderson---Really!?!?! Called strike. Bunts on one hop to Lowe. Pathetic.

Womack—sinker low. Outside. Called right on the plate. Flies.

Walker—Ball outside. Fouls down 1B line. Outside. Bud Selig—Ahh! Is it Halloween already? Wide again. 3-1. Take yer base.

Pujols---crowd gets up. Takes change right over plate. Fouled off. Outside curve—doesn’t go. Varitek to mound. Just missed low—2-2. Again—Lowe wanted it. 3-2. Ortiz and Varitek to mound. Change right over plate--Pops to second. Thinking fastball?

0 runs, 0 hits, 1 LOB
Red Sox 3, Cards 0

Red Sox 7th

Haren in.

Ramirez—Called strike. Outside. Again. Splitter low and outside—Manny swings way ahead. Again—couldn't check. Ks.

Ortiz—low. Low and inside—fouled off. Outside. Grounds behind 1B bag, 31, out.

Varitek—Low. Right over plate. Edmonds on the run. Basket catch at track. Almost overran it.

0 runs, 0 hits, 0 LOB
Red Sox 3, Cards 0

"God Bless America"—Guy from Creed? Tool? Nondescript post-grunge crappy band. Herman Munster was a better singer

Cards 7th

Rolen—Arroyo and Embree up. Inside. Foul Tip. High heat—didn’t get call. Again—now strike. Low—checked swing. Flies right to Damon.

Edmonds—Flies to shallow center. Damon has it.

Renteria—Called strike. Low. Lines to right. Single.

Mabry—Foul. Outside—couldn't hold back. Outside. Sinker—Ks.

0 runs, 1 hit, 1 LOB
Red Sox 3, Cards 0

Red Sox 8th

Mueller—called strike on outside corner. Singles to right.

Conference on mound.

Nixon—into the corner. Double. 2nd and 3rd.

Isringhausen coming in.

Kapler PR at first—defensive change too.Sanders in left double-switch.

Bellhorn—low. Inside but goes. High heat—holds up, 2-1. Fouls. Change—in and low—3-2. High—walks to load bases.

Millar—PH for Lowe. Reese PR for Bellhorn—also a defensive change. Inside. Called low—looked borderline. Swings through cut fastball. High heat—fouled back. Just missed. Ks on high heat.

Damon—change grounded to Pujols to his right on infield grass, across body, FO at home. Nice play.

Cabrera—in dirt—blocked. Outside. Arroyo—up in pen. Off the corner—throws to first to late. Fastball on the outside corner—taking all the way. On inside corner—acts like it almost hits him—1 ft away. Fouled back. Foul tip in and out of glove. High heat—fouled back. Don’t throw that again. Ks—on high heat!

0 runs, 2 runs, 3 LOB
Red Sox 3, Cards 0

Cards 8th

Crappy "In Your Eyes" cover

Arroyo in.

Cedeno—PH for catcher. Called strike. Low. Way inside—hits ump's knee? Pops in front of Reese. Out.

Sanders-- looks 100 yrs old at the plate. Low. Turns on inside fastball—foul. Called strike. Low/outside. Outside—Varitek wanted it. 3-2. High and outside. Walks.

Arroyo gone.

Embree—coming in, struck the side last time

Luna—PH for Womack. "You'll get to know me when you start doing business with me and stop f'ing around, Hector!" High strike. Low—Sanders takes second. High heat—doesn't get it. Cabrera to mound. Fouled off. Fastball all over the plate—Ks

Walker—Foul. Timlin in pen. High and outer half—pops high to short

0 runs, 0 hits, 1 LOB.
Red Sox 3, Cards 0

My friend Mike on the tremendous Luna move: " I always turn to a rule V guy when my season is on the line".

Red Sox 9th

Matheny catching. Luna at second.

Ramirez—Grounds to third.

Mientkiewicz—Flies to shallow right.

Polar Express Play of the Game—where's Leon?

John Henry is an alien

Varitek—Outside. Foul. Strike called. In dirt. Fouled back. Mookie Ball replay. Fouled off. Lines to LF. Single.

Foulke's up.

Mueller—Grounds to short, FO unassisted.

0 runs, 1 hit, 1 LOB
Red Sox 3, Cards 0

Cards 9th

Pujols—Has to be the meat of the order. Called outside corner. Again—called ball. Foul. "It's been an offseason when ordinary foulke been extraordinary foulke"—McCarver keeper. Singles right up the middle.

Rolen—called strike at knees. Swinging. Inside. Flies to deep right. Terrible series.

Edmonds—misses high heat. Fouls. Misses High Heat. Ks

Ok, here it is…Armageddon or Billy Buck II

Renteria—Grounds to Foulke… Armageddon.

0 runs, 1 hit, 1 LOB
Red Sox 3, Cards 0

Jimmy Fallon french-kissing some chick on the field in a Red Sox jacket? Where's "Leon"? (He's waiting for the coin first.)
For Yankees, meeting in the Boss's office tomorrow 8 AM

"We Forgive Bill Buckner"—I feel good for him.

Is Epstein old enough to drink champagne? Theo's a frat boy.

John Henry does his best Emo Phillips impression.

Jeanne with the tough free agent question to Theo. Of course, Schilling has to interrupt with champagne on Theo. Actually, holy water disguised. Jesus helped him because he's sick of hearing all the frigging Red Sox fans' prayers.

LaRussa—aw garshes. Red Sox just played better.

Schilling—"Greatest team in Red Sox history." Really?

"Sweet Caroline"—Neil Diamond? This is 2004, not 1974.

"Rest in peace, Babe"—He won plenty of rings. He's resting fine.